Setting Boundaries: A Love Letter to Myself and My Sanity

As a Black wife, mom, 9-to-5er, and business owner, I wear many hats, and let me tell you, not all of them fit comfortably all the time. The demands of work, home, and business can stretch me thin if I’m not careful. That’s why setting boundaries has become a non-negotiable act of self-love and preservation.

Boundaries at Work: Protecting My Peace

At work, it is easy to get caught up in the hustle and feel obligated to say yes to every task that comes my way. But I've learned that being a team player doesn’t mean being a doormat. Setting boundaries around my workload and availability helps me show up as my best self. When I’m clear about what I can handle, I not only protect my own peace but also create a more honest and productive work environment.

Boundaries at Home: Creating Space for Myself

At home, boundaries are equally crucial. My family is my heart, but I also need time to recharge. I've had to get comfortable saying, “Mommy needs a minute,” or setting aside specific times for self-care. It is not selfish; it is survival. By setting boundaries, I’m modeling healthy behavior for Cooper and showing him that it is okay to take care of yourself.

Boundaries in Business: “All Money Ain’t Good Money”

Now, when it comes to business, boundaries can feel trickier. As a small business owner, especially a Black woman, I understand the fear of losing customers or turning away clients. But I also know that “all money ain’t good money.” If a client doesn’t respect my boundaries, then they are not the right fit for my business. Clear, consistent boundaries protect me from burnout and attract the kind of clients who truly value my work.

Setting boundaries isn’t about being difficult or shutting people out. It is about building a foundation for healthy relationships—whether at work, home, or business. When I set boundaries, I’m not only protecting my energy but also creating a space where everyone knows what to expect. And trust me, that clarity is a gift to everyone involved.

Burnout and Compassion Fatigue: The Silent Thieves

Burnout and compassion fatigue are real, especially when you’re giving so much of yourself to everyone else. Boundaries are the guardrails that keep me from veering off into the dangerous territory of exhaustion. They allow me to nurture my own well-being so that I can continue to pour into others without pouring from an empty cup.

The Bottom Line: Boundaries Benefit Everyone

At the end of the day, boundaries aren’t walls to keep people out—they’re tools to help us show up fully in every role we play. When I care for myself, I’m a better wife, a more present mom, a more effective employee, and a more focused business owner. Boundaries are my way of saying, “I matter too,” and that’s a message I’ll continue to live by—loudly and unapologetically.