Let Them. Let Me. Let Go: How Mel Robbins’ “Let Them Theory” Is Helping Me Grow as a Black Woman, Mom, Wife, and Entrepreneur

There’s a quiet kind of freedom in realizing that the only person you can control is you. That freedom? It’s life-changing. Especially for someone like me—a Black woman navigating motherhood, marriage, entrepreneurship, and a 9-5. I’ve spent so much of my energy trying to “fix,” manage, or convince others to see things my way. But Mel Robbins’ “Let Them Theory” is teaching me something radically simple: let them.

Let them not support your business.

Let them talk behind your back.

Let them leave you out.

Let them misunderstand you.

Let them go.

When I first heard Mel Robbins break down this idea, I nodded my head like yes girl, I get it. But as I’ve been making my way through her book (highly recommend, by the way!), I realized that while the concept is easy to learn, it’s a whole different thing to live.

The Control Illusion

As a wife and mom, I used to think that if I just said the right thing, loved hard enough, or gave a little more, people would change. In my business, I thought if I marketed differently or worked harder, I could control how people responded. At work, I believed that if I proved myself over and over, I’d be treated the way I deserved.

But guess what? You can do everything right and still not get the response you hoped for. That’s because people aren’t projects. They are not assignments to complete. They are who they are—and they have the right to be exactly that.

That’s the heart of the “Let Them Theory.”

Applying “Let Them” to Business

As a business owner, this theory has been a game changer. Not everyone will cheer for you. Some will copy your work. Others will act like your success is invisible. Let them. The time I used to spend being frustrated or explaining myself can now go back into my creativity, my branding, and the community I’m building with Designs by MTK.

I no longer chase validation. I just keep showing up. Unapologetically.

Applying “Let Them” to Relationships

Whether it’s in friendships, marriage, or family—trying to manage other people’s behaviors is exhausting. I’ve had to remind myself: if someone wants to walk out of your life, let them. If someone doesn’t see your value, let them.

That doesn’t mean I don’t care. It means I care enough about myself not to beg for what should be freely given. Letting people be who they are makes room for peace in your life.

Letting Them… and Letting Me

Now here’s the other side of the coin—something Mel Robbins talks about that hit me right in the chest: Let Me.

Let me stop trying to control everything.

Let me release resentment.

Let me protect my peace.

Let me redirect my energy into things I can change.

Let me rest, grow, love, and lead.

This part is about personal responsibility. About reclaiming your power and putting it back where it belongs—on your own choices, habits, and boundaries. “Let Me” reminds me that I’m not helpless. I’m not stuck. I always have a choice in how I respond.

The Work Isn’t Easy—But It’s Worth It

I’m only halfway through the book and still working to apply the “Let Them Theory” daily. Some days, it’s second nature. Other days, I slip back into old patterns. But every day, I remind myself that my peace, my purpose, and my joy are too important to keep handing over to people who don’t know what to do with it.

So to every woman who’s tired of trying to control everything and everyone: Let them.

And then turn your focus inward: Let you.

Let you grow.

Let you shine.

Let you be free.

Final Thought

If this resonated with you even a little bit, do yourself a favor—grab Mel Robbins’ book. It’s not just a read; it’s a mindset shift. And if you’re anything like me, it might just be the key to unlocking the peace you didn’t even know you were missing.

Have you read the book? Are you working on letting go? Drop a comment below and let’s talk about it. We’re in this together. 💛

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